When we returned to Sandpoint, I began having the nagging suspicion that something was missing. I did a quick inventory, and nothing important was missing, at least. Still had my spellbook, all my magical items and my useful tools and alchemical concoctions. It probably wasn’t worth worrying about, and we had bigger things to do. Well, let’s not say bigger. Let’s say more important.
What I’m saying was I was off to seduce Shayliss, and I don’t want to give any woman any reason to suspect that I’ve called her fat.
I went down to the general store to find the sexy young woman, only to find it closed. That was strange. It wasn’t a holiday as far as I knew. I checked a few of the places I had seen her, but she wasn’t at any of them. So I returned to the inn to drop off my non-essential luggage.
Aurora, who had been tailing me to make sure my quest wouldn’t lead me into danger, told me that things in town seemed a little tense to her. I agreed.
When we reached the inn, we found the others seated in the common room. It seems Geo had about as much luck finding Shalelu as I had in searching for Shayliss. Not surprising, really. Shalelu was likely out keeping an eye on the local goblins. She was the town’s protector, more or less, after all.
A messenger for Belor Hemlock arrived just as I returned to the common room after ditching my extra gear. He needed to speak to us, so we headed over to meet with him right away, after I took the time to make sure the others had their stories straight about where I was when that farmer broke his arm.
He looked a bit troubled. “I need your help,” he told us, getting down to business. “There was a murder last night. Two people were killed at the lumber mill. My men are investigating, but they’re a bit green.”
“Goblins are green!” Lenn interrupted enthusiastically. Geo took a moment to quiet the man.
Hemlock continued. “Anyway, they don’t have the experience with this kind of thing that they need, and I was hoping you five would be able to help out again, since you had such luck exposing and stopping the goblin plot.” Damn. I had been hoping that book two of this obvious trilogy would wait at least a few months. Hell, Dresden gets a year between most books. Is it too much to ask that I be given time to find a steady, non-committal girlfriend before more horrifying crap goes down? Really? Is it?
Paulie spoke first. “Righteous, man. You can count on us, bro.” Yeah, if his voice sounded like a mix of Keanu Reeves and that turtle from Finding Nemo, you got it right. There’s something seriously wrong with that guy. As soon as this damn town gives me a breather, I’m going to have to figure out what the hell is going on with him. I took Psych 101 as an elective back in freshman year, mostly because I thought it meant the show and not psychology, but that should be enough to diagnose whatever the heck is going on, right? Of course, that’s going to follow finding a steady bedmate and figuring out why it is Aurora seems to have spell resistance that only works some of the time.
I pulled out my magic sleeves and put them on, picturing a classic Sherlock Holmes outfit. My clothing immediately changed to match what I was picturing. “Alright, we’re in. What do we know already?” I made a mental note to buy a pipe sometime, since the outfit was lacking without it. No one commented on my change of clothing.
“Well, we think the killer is someone you know.” Because of course s/he was.
“Why do you suspect that?” Geo asked.
“We found this at the scene.” He pulled out a note. The note was quite disturbing and I shall not write the contents here lest it drive you off the very cliffs of insanity, but it was signed ‘Your Lordship’. On the back was the name of the person who it was addressed to. It was smeared, but I know my own name when I read it. Well crap.
“Who was killed?” I asked, my face in my palm.
“One of the victims was Katrine Vinder.”
Of course she was. I pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to stave off a headache. “Let me guess. The other was Banny Harker?”
The sheriff seemed surprised at that. “We haven’t told anyone that. How did you know?”
“Long story. Short version is that rumor about town is that the two of them were involved and it was causing her father no end of grief.”
He seemed satisfied with that answer. Then his mood darkened. “We had to lock up Venn. He flew into a rage and attacked me and my men when we told him his daughter had been killed. I don’t think he was involved, but right now he’s the only suspect we have.”
“Anything else we should know?” Geo asked.
“Yes. Harker’s body was mutilated. Someone carved this into him.” He pulled out a piece of paper, which had a rough sketch of a sihedron on it, because of course it did. At least one of us must have shown recognition on our faces, because he asked, “Do you know what it is?”
“Yeah, we know what it is,” I said, trying not to face palm once more. I pulled out the amulet I was wearing. “We pulled this off of Nuallia’s corpse.”
He seemed startled. “Put that away. Don’t let anyone but me see it. I don’t believe you all had anything to do with it, especially since you weren’t even in Sandpoint when the other murders happened, but you know how people talk.”
“Other murders?” Aurora asked, startled.
“Yeah. Some local con artists. They were carved up like Harker and we found a similar note, but this one was written to them, inviting them to help out with some kind of scheme. I’m sure they’re related, but I’m not sure what made these separate individuals into targets.”
“You didn’t mention that Katrine was mutilated like the others. How did she die?”
“Looks like she was pushed into the wood chopper.”
I puffed on an imaginary pipe for a moment. “Okay, so how about this. Perhaps she and her lover got into a fight and he accidentally pushed her into the wood chopper. Then, having witnessed the fight, our killer struck at the man who killed her. You see, whoever this is, maybe they are trying to kill those who have committed crimes. Perhaps another runewell related plot?”
“It’s not bad as a theory,” Geo agreed.
“It’s better than anything we have,” Hemlock replied. “Go check out the scene of the murder, talk to Venn and maybe talk to the guy who witnessed the first murder.”
“There was a witness?” Man, this sheriff may be good at keeping the peace, but he really sucks as a detective.
“Grayst Sevilla. Local thug and known associate of the three dead cons. They usually hire him to protect them. He’s in bad shape. Gone mad. We have him at Habe’s Sanitorium outside town. We thought he may have done it, but he was locked up when this second set of murders happened.”
“Anyone else we should talk to?”
“Ibor Thorn, Harker’s partner. He found the bodies at the mill. We’ve detained him at the mill’s office, but we’ll need to let him go soon.”
I took a moment to bend a gold coin as a cap for Geo’s sihedron ring. While I was working, Lenn pointed out that my hair seemed shorter. Merde, crap and Battlefield Earth. Lyrie Akenja had that pouch filled with hair and nail clippings and such.
We headed off to investigate the murder scene. As we walked, I addressed the others. “When it turns out this is being done by Lyrie and I’m vindicated for suggesting we kill her when we had the chance, I expect your apologies to be long and drawn out. Public, too.”
Unless you want to give me your apology in private, Aurora. If you know what I mean.
<I wouldn’t count on it.>
When we arrived, the guards let us in. Geo and I headed to the murder scene while the others went to speak to Thorn. It was a gruesome sight and smelled horrible. I’ll spare you the worst details, but here’s what we think happened. Someone came out of the swamp near the mill and entered the mill through an open window. He attacked Katrine and Banny. Katrine tried to fight him off with an axe. In the struggle, she was pushed into the running wood chopper, but not before striking her foe. We collected rotting flesh from the axe, which we identified as some kind of undead, though not the type.
Then the foe took its time killing Banny. Flesh was peeled off, his jaw was missing – likely to prevent us from using magic to speak with his corpse – and the rune was carved into him. Then the murderer made its way to the city’s waterways, likely covering its tracks and its scent. Remind me to start boiling any water I drink in this town.
The others discovered from Thorn that Banny had been cooking the books and stealing money from the mill’s owners, the Scarnettis. Lovely family, that one. Suspected of burning down competing mills and likely to brutally kill someone stealing from them. But I don’t know that they have control of undead and I don’t know that there’s a connection to the other murders. Likely a red herring. Will investigate it, but not wasting too much time with it.
As we walked to the jailhouse, we discussed what we knew. “It’s too bad that no one witnessed this murder,” Geo lamented. “I mean, there was one guy who saw the other one, but he’s crazy and likely won’t tell us much. We could use a more solid lead. I know you suspect it’s Lyrie, but I’d like more proof.”
I thought for a moment and a realization hit. “There was one witness to the murder.”
The others looked shocked. “What? Who? How do you know that someone witnessed it?” Aurora asked.
“Elementary, my dear Aurora,” I said. “On my world, we’d have the entire CSI team gathering forensic evidence. With DNA and other tools, this would be an open and shut case. But this isn’t my world, which means we can’t use those.”
“I don’t see how that helps us,” Geo said.
“Yeah, dude, I think you’re riding the wrong wave,” Paulie added.
“You’d think that, but you’d be looking at the downside. You see, this isn’t my world, which means there are other tools available to us that are completely beyond what we could do back home.”
“So what does this have to do with another witness? Who could you mean?” Aurora asked
“Katrine Vinder.”
“I hate to break it to you,” Geo said, “But I’m pretty sure she’s dead.”
“We can rebuild her. We have the technology,” I said with a wink.
“What?” Aurora asked, still confused.
Geo caught my meaning. “She was in two pieces, but she was all there! The killer didn’t mutilate her or take any of her body parts! But still, that’s going to be expensive. I don’t think we have the money.”
“Would anyone care to tell me what you two are talking about?” Aurora seemed to be getting more confused.
“It’s elementary, my dear Aurora. Back on my world, bringing someone back to life would be impossible. Here, it only costs a trip to Magnimar and a very sizable donation to one of the large temples to pay for the materials needed. We could be speaking with Katrine Vinder within a couple of days. I think I know someone who will front us the money and we can pay them back later. We’ll get Sheriff Hemlock to have some guards escort her body and continue our investigation. You all in for helping me pay back the loan when we get the money?” The others agreed.
All the guards at the jail were giving Venn Vinder a wide berth. His cell was the only occupied one as we went to speak with him. Upon walking in, I immediately cast a charm upon him, making him regard me as a close friend and trusted ally. I had prepared it that day to use on him, after all, but I was expecting to be talking my way out of an ass whooping while getting dressed if I needed it.
He eyed the others warily, but seemed to relax when Lenn handed him a sausage. Seems he hadn’t eaten all day.
I spoke with him, and he told me what he could. The man was clearly heartbroken. Can’t blame him. I would be too. In a moment of compassion, I made a mistake. I told him that we were going to revive his daughter. We should probably be keeping that on the down low. We don’t want the killer finding out and interfering. But I told him anyway. He told me that he would hold me to it.
He had no real enemies, so we didn’t think the killing was revenge on him. And he confirmed that his surviving family was staying with a friend, so they should be safe. Our questions asked, we headed off to go speak to Brodert Quink. Perhaps his more extensive knowledge on Thassilon would help us decipher what connection there was with the rune.
First, we showed the scholar the flesh sample we’d taken from the crime scene. He seemed to recognize it and grabbed one of his books, which identified it as ghast flesh. Crap. I knew enough about ghasts to know that they carry ghoul fever, a less virulent form of plague similar to the zombie plagues you see in movies back home. We would need to go make sure we destroyed the brains of the mutilated victims. Katrine was likely fine, since it was obvious that she hadn’t died from the plague itself, which was required to reanimate them, but Banny was still suspect. The other three had died too long ago to be capable of coming back from it.
Quink told us a bit more about the sihedron. He told us that most scholars believe it represents the seven virtues of rulership: Wealth, Fertility, Honest Pride, Abundance, Eager Striving, Righteous Anger and Rest. He has a different suspicion. He thinks it represents wrath, greed, sloth, pride, lust, envy, and gluttony. Yeah, the seven deadly freaking sins. Because of course it does. I’m going to skip the part where we start out not believing the scholar with the whacky theories only to have him vindicated later and go straight to believing him. I’ll let the others decide if they want to believe him or not.
Quink said he’d look into it more for us, and we headed off to where they were keeping the bodies. We bored a hole into the back of Banny Harker’s skull, then Geo drank a potion and inserted one of his tentacles into the hole. The sound it made was disgusting and I’m never eating calamari again. A moment later, there was the sound of an electrical arc and we smelled the brain burning. Eww.
After replacing the removed piece of skull, we checked out the other three bodies. Sure enough, the same mutilations. Jaws missing, sihedron rune, all that. We then spoke to Sheriff Hemlock and filled him in on the plan for Katrine. He agreed to have a couple of his guards secretly take the body to Magnimar by wagon. I told him I’d have the funds to him by morning, or at least a letter to my adopted family to secure them if the person I was going to speak to wouldn’t help us.
It was evening after we left Belor Hemlock and I wasn’t going to a sanitorium at night. Nuh uh. Ain’t happening. So we returned to the inn and I told the others I would send a messenger to the person who would hopefully loan us the money. While the others went about their business, I snuck into the kitchen.
Inside, Ameiko Kaijutsu was kneading some kind of dough. She was wearing a low cut blouse and pants that must have required mechanical aid to squeeze into and a cute little apron that did nothing to hide the cleavage exposed by her shirt. Thank god for that.
She smiled when she spotted me. “If you’re here to make another attempt at seducing me, it’s going to fail just as bad as last time.”
I shrugged nonchalantly. “Can’t have failed that bad if seeing me makes you smile,” I said sagely.
She laughed. It was good to hear her laugh. Poor girl had been through a lot lately. “Okay, so perhaps you didn’t make quite as much of a jackass of yourself as you could have. So what brings you here?”
“Aside from a chance to see you with that cute little bit of flour on your cheek?”
She laughed again. “Yes, aside from that.”
“Actually, I hate to ask, but I need a major favor. Can you keep a secret?” She agreed that she could and I told her about the murder and our plan to revive Katrine.
She listened thoughtfully and responded. “I can understand your need for secrecy. How can I help?”
“I need to borrow the money. I can get it from my adopted family back in Absalom, but that could take days, maybe even weeks. The longer we delay, the more we risk further murders. The faster we can act, the more people we can save.”
“You and your friends saved my life and this town. I’ll gladly help out. I’ll give the money to Sheriff Hemlock first thing in the morning.”
“Good, now we just need to explain why I was in here in case anyone’s following me, since we think the murderer might be someone we know.” I looked at her and said completely deadpan. “I’m going to need to grab your butt and you need to chase me out of here and shout at me.”
“Wait, you’re going to what?” Before she could react, I had already given her firm butt a good squeeze and dodged away, grabbing a couple meat pies before fleeing the kitchen. She chased after me with the wooden rod she used as a rolling pin, though I could see she was fighting to look annoyed instead of laughing as we burst into the common room.
It’s too bad that she doesn’t seem like the kind of girl down for a casual romp. She’s beautiful, exotic and a lot of fun to talk to. I’m sure I could successfully woo this one, but only if I wanted a real relationship. There’s only one girl I’d consider that kind of thing with since she’s already agreed to go back to Earth with me, but that doesn’t seem like it’s gonna happen. Oh well, plenty of other beautiful girls in this town. I’m sure at least a few of them are down for a relationship that doesn’t have any chance in ending in marriage.
Once I had finished eluding the feisty woman with the rolling pin, I made my way up to my room. Remembering my missing hair, I prepared and cast a spell to warn me of intruders to the room and sat down to take stock of my possessions. It seems I was missing some socks. Since there weren’t any dryers to lose them in here, I knew that this was likely the work of Lyrie, though it made sense.
I guess Amanda Kaddren might have taken them and the hair as a memento, but that would be too easy. No, someone I don’t want to have them has my socks and some of my hair. Yeah, that’s not a thought I needed before going to bed. Maybe if I think about how firm Ameiko’s butt was I can block that other thought out.
Can’t hurt to try.
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